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State of the Six Address: Chickenfoot is the Hardest Foot of Them All 
BROOKLYN, June 12 -- The following can be attributed to Dick Valentine:Hello everybody. We've needed an update for a while, but I am of the mind that you don't force things like that. You bring it when it's time to bring it. Yes, we've been recording and I suppose that's newsworthy. Our sixth album will be finished soon and it will be released in October. It sounds wonderful and I fully intend for this to be the first Electric Six album that sees each and every song being included in our live set when we tour this fall. Because you see, I am getting older and I have very little patience for bullshit. Which brings me to the main reason for updating our news section. You may be aware that Sammy Hagar, Joe Satriani, Michael Anthony and Chad Smith have formed a band called Chickenfoot. Perhaps, like me, you became aware of this when you were watching television. And like Kevin Costner in JFK, I was just a regular person without any real stake in the matter when I heard the news. Like Kevin Costner, I began to lose sleep at night because there were too many questions. And a voice in my head told me to dig a little deeper and discover the truth. From the beginning, the questions led to more questions. Why on earth do you team the world's greatest guitar player and the world's greatest drummer with the world's luckiest bass player???? It seems to me the obvious move in this situation was to get Tony Danza on bass guitar. What is going on here???????? I read the wikipedia entry and that got me nowhere. Just a bunch of predictable drivel about them loving rock and blues and being good buddies who like to jam. This still does not help me sleep. Why is Michael Anthony in the band when Tony Danza is available????? I had to go back to the basics. I looked at the components of other supergroups....Oysterhead, Damn Yankees, Asia, Girls Aloud....in each case they either had Les Claypool, Jack Blades, that swedish-looking guy or no bass player at all. THIS APPROACH GOT ME NOWHERE. I was becoming frustrated. I was not sleeping or holding down solid food. Questions led to more questions and then only to dead ends. I was considering packing it in and going to Cabo Wabo for a month to drink my face off and forget the whole thing. And then, just like that...it hit me square in the face. Cabo Wabo. Sammy Hagar. It had something to do with Sammy Hagar!!!! The Van Halen connection. That's what this was all about. It was about Sammy Hagar going around Tony Danza to help out his friend from Van Halen and hopefully get him some money again. My god, it was right in front of me all along!!! How could I have forgotten about Sammy Hagar!!! How blind I was!!! Sammy Hagar is in Chickenfoot too!!!! He's the reason Michael Anthony is the bass player instead of Tony Danza!!!!! I furiously began to write down my discovery, pausing only to eat Alka Seltzer tablets directly from the package. I took great care to save my work every 30 seconds and back it up on hard drives and microfiche. When completed, I sent one draft to Russia, put one in the freezer, and swallowed the other five. I had one foot out my front door when the phone rang. I wish I could tell you that I never answered the phone...that I kept on going out the front door. Because if I had, I'd still believe that Michael Anthony was in Chickenfoot instead of Tony Danza because of Sammy Hagar. And life would go on and everything would make sense, and I'd be no worse for any of it. But I didn't. I answered the phone. And because I answered the phone I know some things now I wish I didn't know. I know that sometimes, bad things happen to good people and no one can stop it...ever. I know that Joe Satriani is a strange man. I know that I don't have much time before they find me and I have to keep moving. And most of all...I know that the Chickenfoot...is the hardest foot of them all. (to be continued)
BREAKING NEWS: Electric Six Gets a Star on the Wall at First Avenue in Minneapolis!
MINNEAPOLIS, April 7 -- Today, The Electric Six was memorialized forever (or until they are deemed shitty and irrelevant enough to paint over) with a coveted star on the outside wall of Minneapolis' legendary music venue First Avenue and Seventh Street Entry. The band, upon seeing the star, became visibly emotional and could be heard expressing their gratitude and awe over the honour. "Fuck", said Tait Nucleus. "Shit," said The Colonel. "About fucking time," remarked Johnny Nashinal. "I'm gonna eat the riiiiiideeeer," said Smorgasbord.Longtime First Avenue liason Conrad Sverkerson was there to greet the band upon arrival and point out the freshly painted star. "We painted over Skinny Puppy," said Sverkerson. "We know you guys wanted us to paint over the BoDeans, but there would have been problems." Across the street at the Target Center, Canadian rockers Nickelback were getting ready to play their own show, but they took time out of their soundcheck to congratulate Electric Six. "I'm the guy from Nickelback," remarked Nickelback frontman Chad Kroeger when told of the Electric Six honor across the street. "Hell yeaaaaaah, dude! I'm the guy from Nickelback!" Electric Six is humbled by the gesture by First Avenue and would like to state for the record that there is no finer venue in the world to play.
Dick Valentine to appear again on Fox News' "Red Eye" on Tuesday Morning
It's EARLY Tuesday morning...as in 3 AM early...but if you can't make it up that late/early, set your DVR for Fox News' "Red Eye with Greg Gutfield," which will feature an appearance by our own Dick Valentine. If you missed Dick's appearance on this show in December, you'll want to be sure to catch this one. "Red Eye" is a panel show in which the guests offer humorous takes on current events, as well as an interview segment with Dick.
April/May US Tour announced
Electric Six is thrilled to announce its upcoming tour of the United States in April and May. This one is sticking mostly to the Eastern half of the country, but we'll be back out West again this Fall. Joining us on this run will be Bang Camaro on dates between April 2 and April 16 and Living Things from April 17 until May 9.A handful of additional dates will be announced shortly for this tour, so keep checking back for further details.
Steeler Nation
PITTSBURGH, TAMPA, Feb. 1 -- The following can be attributed to Dick Valentine:Steeler Nation.
Frequently Asked Questions 2009!!!!
BROOKLYN, JAN. 10 -- You've emailed us. You've myspaced us. You've asked the tough questions. And today....we've compiled them all from the last 365 days and given you the sassiest answers yet. It's the answers to the most frequently asked questions Electric Six must answer because we answer questions with answers. Ready?? Here goes.Q. I am a music reviewer and I have just been given the responsibility of reviewing the new Electric Six album. I think Electric Six is a joke. Do you have any idea how my review should read? A. Sure! Try this sure-fire template! It's worked dozens of times for people just like you: Electric Six -- New Album Aging Detroit pranksters determined to tell the same tired joke over and over again, even though it was never funny in the first place You can imagine my surprise when I was told that Electric Six had a new record coming out. After all, their 2003 debut "Fire" should have been the only thing they were permitted to release and then they should have been taken out to a field and put out of their misery. Then imagine how surprised I was when I found out that they've had four albums come out since "Fire"! How?? More importantly, why??? Every song on this new album is just a watered-down version of their 15-minute-of-fame novelty hit "Gay Bar". Lead singer Dick Valentine sounds like a tired, bitter sideshow freak trying to be a third-rate Tom Jones. He spits out his inane, stupid lyrics with an idiotic bravado and he exudes an undeserved confidence that he clearly wouldn't have if he truly understood what a joke I think he is. The rest of the band compliment Valentine's total lack of imagination. Every guitar riff on this new album is a watered-down homage to the repetitive twang of 2003 novelty hit "Gay Bar". Occasionally keyboardist Tait Nucleus chimes in with bleeps and blops designed to dupe the odd listener into thinking that these guys are capable of doing something interesting or intelligent, but no self-respecting music lover will ever take the bait. It's fine when the Killers, the Kills or LCD Soundsystem do it. It's not when Electric Six does it. If there's any saving grace about this new Electric Six album, it is that it makes the listener profoundly grateful he is not in Electric Six. There's no way the people in this band are happier than I am. They think they are funny, but the joke is on them in the form of my review. I know about music. I know what's funny. And I'm going to call them on it. Somehow, some day, this review and others like it will put an end to Electric Six. Too much is at stake. What? No....mom...can it wait? I'm writing a music review....what? NO! I told you, I'll mow the lawn when I'm done with this....Jesus Christ, mom...I gotta finish this review and stop this band....mom, you know nothing about how important music is...I didn't get into knowing about music so I could mow your fucking lawn....Jesus, mom...and shut my fucking door on your way back upstairs.... Q. Dick Valentine, you are the MAN! You buy the drugs at the gay bar! LOL! You are rad, dude. Here are my digits: 555-555-5555. Hit me up sometime, bro. It would be rad to talk to you on the phone!!! Don't front on me, bro....give me a call, okay? A. Rest assured, Dick Valentine has your number and is going over his talking points at this very minute. A noted perfectionist, Valentine will not make the phone call to you until he is absolutely sure he knows what he is going to say. He owes you that. Q. Hey guys, I see you are playing a show in my town soon. You guys are my favorite band. Unfortunately, I don't have any money. I wanna come to your show so bad my dick hurts, but I can't because I am not good at the whole making money thing. Could you let me into your show for free?? A. We got this one a lot this year. We certainly understand people are hurting because of the economy. But here's an exercise you can do to best understand our response to this (or lack thereof). Close your eyes. Now, picture how things would be for us if word got out that all you had to do was email us and ask to get in for free and then you get in for free. Concentrate. Can you picture it?? Can you see how things would be for us??? Good. Q. Hey guys. I am a filmmaker and I want to go on the road with you guys and film your tour and do a documentary about life behind the scenes with Electric Six. I promise to make you guys look good and you will barely notice me. Whaddya say? A. No amount of creative editing or flattering narrative will make us look good as long as our souls are as bankrupt as they currently are. We can put on the best face we have....and the camera will inevitably see through us. Our hearts beating now only out of habit...only because they still can. And no amount of generous documentation can mask that. Plus we don't want an extra person in our van for 5 weeks. Q. You named your 2005 album "Switzerland" because you've never been there before and you hoped that by doing so, you'd get a chance to play there. Four long years later, the dream is becoming a reality. How do you feel about finally going to Switzerland? A. Rad. Stoked. And let this be an inspiration to all bands and musicians out there. If you name your album after a country, you will be invited to play there someday. So, for example if you live in Mexico or Cuba and you name your album "The United States of America", rest assured you will be receiving a first class ticket to Los Angeles in due time. Q.Now that Bush is leaving office, will you still play Rock and Roll Evacuation? A. Nothing changes. Bush is eternal. Bush is all around you. You think that's air you're breathing right now? You think the water in the ocean is merely hydrogen and oxygen? You are a fool. There is Bush in all things. Bush is moving through all of us. You can feel Bush when you stare into the internet's eye. You can feel Bush in the low end of one of Smorgasbord's bass solos. Bush is forever. Bush is the alpha and the omega. George W. Bush....is love. The kind of love you want to have a beer with. The kind of love that would pull over to help you if you were broken down on the side of the road. The kind of love that holds the stars in place and keeps the polar ice caps from melting. So it doesn't matter if Barack Obama or Mitt Romney is president. Rock and Roll Evacuation will be about Bush until the end of time. It is worth noting that a correctly spelled "Barack Obama" registers as a misspelling when spellchecked. A correctly spelled "Mitt Romney" does not. Something to think about in 2012....
State of the Six Address: A Big Sloppy Thank You to ALL
CROOKLYN, Dec. 18 -- The following can be attributed to Dick Valentine:Hey you! I want to thank you for coming to one of our shows in the last two months. We've been energized by your enthusiasm and we can't wait to go out and do it again in the spring. In Madrid, you made us feel like Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds in Wings of Desire. In Spartanburg, you made us feel like a bunch of good ole boys. In the four nations of the British Isles, you made us feel like ambassadors of karate and friendship for everyone. In Detroit, you made us feel like we belong again. Honestly, we've never felt this good about being in Electric Six. We're gonna do another record now. Happy Holidays. Love from us to you.
New viral game featuring "Formula 409"
Sponsored by UK-based King of Shaves, welcome to "King of Air Guitar." Scroll through until you see the album cover for "Flashy" and you'll hear the hopefully now familiar strains of "Formula 409."
www.kingofairguitar.com
Brief Update to Tour News
DETROIT, Oct. 14 -- Electric Six regrets to announce today that due to circumstances beyond their control, our friends The Golden Dogs are unable to join Local H and us for any of the scheduled tour dates. This does not change the fact that we believe The Golden Dogs are the best live band we've ever seen.If you are in a band in any of the towns we are scheduled to visit, you may be doing the math and realizing that there are some open support slots available now. The decision for any bands that may be added to bills will be made by local venues and local promoters only. Neither Electric Six nor our booking agent, The Agency Group, will be involved in deciding who fills the vacant slots. If you were planning on coming to these shows just to see the Golden Dogs, rest assured, you may want to come anyway. Don't take it from us. Take it from lead dog Dave Azzolini, who just yesterday went to the top of the CN Tower in his hometown of Toronto and shouted these words to the citizens below: "If you were planning on coming to see us at any point in the next five weeks, the best way to honour our absence is to go to the show anyway!"
Electric Six to Release 'Flashy' on Round Records in UK and Europe
DETROIT, BIRMINGHAM, UK, Sept. 10 -- Electric Six is very happy to announce that we've signed with Round Records for the United Kingdom and Europe. This means that the band's forthcoming record, "Flashy," will be in all major (and minor) record stores for our overseas fans to enjoy and purchase. You can visit Round at www.myspace.com/roundrecordsuk
New video for "Formula 409" is up
Please check the MySpace page for details and viewing.
Electric Six to tour with Local H, Golden Dogs
We're excited to announce that the itinerary for the upcoming "Hittin' The Walls and Workin' The Middle" tour around the impending release of E6's fifth album, 'Flashy' is announced (see the right hand side of this page for details). We're even more excited to let you know that we'll be sharing stages across America with Chicago's Local H and Canada's Golden Dogs. We've been fortunate enough to play with both of these fine bands before, but never in such an extended fashion. It should make for a fantastic night of music, so we look forward to seeing everyone out this fall.* The Chicago date at the Double Door will not feature Local H. The DeKalb date will not feature the Golden Dogs. Otherwise, all tour dates will include both bands.
Electric Six Announces the Release of its Fifth Album, "Flashy"
DETROIT, July 18 -- Electric Six, in conjunction with Metropolis Records, is proud to announce the North American release of our fifth record entitled "Flashy", for October 21. Releases in other territories will follow."Flashy" was recorded by our very own The Colonel at his Hamtramck Sound Machine studio. The tracklisting for "Flashy" is as follows: 1. Gay Bar Part Two 2. Formula 409 3. We Were Witchy Witchy White Women 4. Dirty Ball 5. Lovers Beware 6. Your Heat is Rising 7. Face Cuts 8. Heavy Woman 9. Flashy Man 10. Watching Evil Empires Fall Apart 11. Graphic Desginer 12. Transatlantic Flight 13. Making Progress A music video was filmed for "Formula 409" recently in Detroit. The band will take to the road in support of this new record in the United States in October and November, and will head to the UK, Ireland and Spain in December.
Retirement by 40??? Electricsix.com Has 5 Hot Tips To Make It Happen
The economy is tanking. The price of oil is skyrocketing. Unemployment is on the rise. What are you going to do? One route is to blame President Bush and congress, blame Countrywide Financial and Enron, blame China. Another idea is to get a third job.Or maybe, just maybe, you want to deal with it by retiring while you are still young and laugh at everyone else from the deck of your brand new yacht while you guzzle champagne and fuck expensive prostitutes!!!! Sound far-fetched?? Not as much as you'd think! Chase away your fears and worries. A lavish retirement may be headed your way sooner than you think if you follow these five simple tips brought to you by electricsix.com 1) By low, sell high Real estate is a tried and true method of procuring quick wealth. No doubt you've heard talk of a mortgage crisis and the housing bubble bursting. Our advice? Ignore all that. Buy a house for not a lot of money, put a new coat of paint on it and then sell it for twice what you paid for it. You've just doubled your money!!!! That was easy! 2)Diversify, diversify, diversify The market has been volatile of late, but don't worry about any of that. Many young investors make the mistake of putting their money in stocks that aren't oil companies. We recommend strongly that you put your money in stocks that ARE oil companies. And when it comes to oil companies, the more the merrier. Diversify your oil portfolio. Don't just buy stock in ExxonMobil when you can also buy stock in ConocoPhillips, British Petroleum, Royal Dutch Shell and the House of Saud. A diverse oil portfolio makes sure that you make more money while the money makes more money. 3) Find that Canadian 5-dollar bill you saved because you thought it was funny that it had hockey players on it Remember that Canadian 5-dollar bill you kept because you thought it was funny that they put hockey players on their money? At today's exchange rate, that Canadian 5-dollar bill is worth 67,000 US dollars. Find that thing. 4) Steal David Beckham's identity If you have a free afternoon, go to Los Angeles and rummage through David Beckham's garbage until you find a few of his credit card statements and computer passwords. Then get a hold of an encryption scrambler and an electromagnetic pulse that momentarily shuts down the power grid. Granted, these items are not cheap, but if looked upon as an investment, the return will be massive. Go back home after the EMP blast and enter the keycodes and Fibonnaci sequences into the internet and within minutes you can make David Beckham's money start working for you. 5) Just say "No!" This might be the simplest tip of all, and also the most important. People in your life want money and payments from you all the time. By saying "no", your will notice your bank account begin to say "yes". You want me to get the next round of drinks?? No...how about YOU get it! You want me to pay for that gas I just pumped into my car? No...how about you stick it all the way up with a red hot ass poker!!!! You want me to pay my credit card statement??? No....let's not and say we did!!! By saying no to every potential payment life throws at you, your money supply never gets depleted. At times, others will react poorly to your financial strategy but the important thing is to ask yourself what is most important. Do you remain focused on the goal or do you let whining ninnies and greedy money-grubbing twits distract you from the endgame? Like anything in life, you have a choice. We believe if you choose to say no and hold the line every time, your golden years will be upon you sooner than you think. Call the harbormaster....tell him he's gonna have to make room for one more yacht!!!!
Electric Six to headline Laura Rock Benefit Show on May 23 in Pontiac
Electric Six is a touring machine, as many readers will know. We play a lot of shows in a given year, and 2008 is no exception. However, we won't play a more important show than the one scheduled for Friday, May 23 at the Crofoot Ballroom in Pontiac, Michigan. That's because this particular show is a benefit for a good friend of the band, Laura Rock, who's in a tough position and is in need of all of our support at this time.Laura's a long standing supporter and friend of the Detroit music scene, and she's recently had some critical health issues arise, and along with that comes the associated astronomical costs. So, to at least try to make a dent in that, E6 is part of the best lineup Detroit area music fans will see all year, with all proceeds from the show being donated to Laura and her family. The lineup for this show is truly a who's who of what's going on in Detroit music. In addition to E6, the show will feature performances from The Meatmen (Lansing/Touch and Go Hardcore legends, fronted by original king funnyman Tesco Vee), SSM (Detroit supergroup featuring members of the Hentchmen, Sights, and Cyril Lords), Johnny Headband (well-loved Detroit eclectics featuring E6's own Smorgasbord, performing under his stage name "Keith Thompson"), Carjack (Detroit Electronic robo-rock) and Deastro (Detroit two man electronic insanity). All of this, for the recession-friendly price of $15. So, for anyone (and they are legion) who knows Laura or for anyone who's looking for the best night of music they'll hear in 2008, this is a can't miss show. Doors are at 6:30, and we anticipate this will be a VERY busy show, so make sure to get there early.
State of the Six Address: Summer Starts for Us in April This Year
BROOKLYN, Apr. 9 -- The following can be attributed to Dick Valentine: Aloha. I write a short blurb to inform one and all alike that the Extermination of the USA, UK, and Spain is complete. Electric Six is proud of Electric Six and Electric Six would like to take this time to congratulate deyself.We continue to work on our fifth album and we work with the understanding that we are going to release this record in October 2008 on Metropolis Records. This next record was meant to be shorter, more concise. It is not turning out that way. Also, we are intending to take a sizeable break from playing shows for a few months. We haven't had a good long break since 2004, so we are cashing in that chip right now and it feels good, Jack. I can't speak for what my bandmates will do with their time, but I have recently discovered Las Vegas. I had never been there before last month (our show last year at the Beauty Bar doesn't count) and now I want to move there forever. I intend to fly there twice a month, by myself, hanging out for days on end, by myself....in Vegas. This is how I'm going to spend my time off. I always wondered what I'd do when I take time off from the band. The answer: I'm going to Vegas by myself. A lot. A big thanks to everyone who saw us Exterminate this year. We certainly appreciate your business. Enjoy your summer and we'll see you in the fall.
Two American Troubador Shows, Two Time Zones
DETROIT, March 24 -- A quick announcement to be announced. We announce that Dick Valentine will be playing two American Troubador solo acoustic shows next week -- one in Detroit, MI, one in Portland, OR.On Sunday, March 30 he will perform at the Belmont Bar in Hamtramck (10215 Jos Campau between Holbrook and Caniff). On Saturday, April 5 he will be performing at The Towne Lounge in Portland, OR (714 SW 20th Pl). The American Troubador concert series is designed to strip down the Electric Six experience its basest, most acoustic level. Dick Valentine behaves erratically without the security blanket of his bandmates and if you are lucky you might witness a complete and utter meltdown by this living legend on either of these nights. It's always an incredible experience to watch your music heroes succumb to their paranoia, so roll the dice and come on out!
New Video for Randy's Hot Tonight!
BIRMINGHAM, UK, Feb. 28 -- Electric Six, in conjunction with Street Boners and TV Carnage, are proud to present the exclusive hosting of the new video for "Randy's Hot Tonight!". The website is www.streetbonersandtvcarnage.com . Or www.sbtvc.com . for those of you short of time.The video was directed by TV Carnage. It features Dick Valentine playing the part of Randy, a Westchester County socialite, who has dreams of being on televisions. The video will be hosted exclusively on the SBTVC site for a bit before allowing itself to spread on the internets.
Doncaster Venue Change and New Show!
The Doncaster show will be at The Priory. Tickets are available through seetickets.com
We've also added a show in Shrewsbury at The Buttermarket on February 26. Please see seetickets.com for online tickets to that gig as well.
Frequently Asked Questions 2008!!!!!
DETROIT, Jan 4 -- Happy New Year!!! We answer your questions at the top of each year. Every year. Okay, let's go.Q. Hey, how much would it cost for me to have you guys come here to play my birthday party/wedding/bar mitzvah/60's b-movie retro party/parole hearing? You guys are my favorite band and it would be awesome if you could be here to play this event!!!! So, how much would it take to get that done?? A. It all depends on how far we have to drive, what time of year it is and whether or not we are in the midst of touring. But our minimum asking price under any circumstance is $X. Q. Woah, woah, wait a minute. You don't understand. I just said you guys are my FAVORITE BAND. I bought BOTH of your albums!! I bought t-shirts!!! I PAID to see you guys....twice! And now you want more money???? I have to say this really takes me by surprise. I thought you guys were cool....like me. I thought you guys didn't have that arrogant rockstar attitude. But I guess I was wrong. You should really reconsider. Don't ever forget the little people who got you to where you are now. I thought maybe after all I've done for you, buying both your albums, telling all my friends about you guys...the least you could do is drive 12 hours to play my event for $200 and some free beer. And you get to rock! In front of me and my friends...who love you!!!!! But I guess you guys are too busy being asshole millionaires to remember the people that got you to where you are now. This really hurts. You used to be my favorite band. It's clear you don't care about me or my friends or everything I've done for you. How could I have been so wrong about you? A. It all depends on how far we have to drive, what time of year it is and whether or not we are in the middle of touring. But our minimum asking price under any circumstance is $X. Q. When will your fifth record be released? A. We don't know yet. Hopefully later this year. Perhaps as late as early next year. Our feet hurt. We need to soak our feet in salt water. We have to address our podiatric issues first and then we'll worry about the release date of our next record on Metropolis Records. We have begun recording though. It has already begun. Q. You guys should release a DVD of all your videos. And you should release a DVD of a live concert. Why haven't you done this? A. These are both fine ideas that we hope come to fruition someday. We certainly understand there is a market for such releases. But we'll explain it away like this. Did you ever see Forrest Gump? You know, the Robert Zemeckis thriller with a conservative slant where we learned that it is best to be simple and stupid, otherwise you will most likely end up with AIDS? Yes, that's the one. Well, you know how he just keeps running? That's how we are with touring and audio recording. We're just loveable morons and we can't stop doing what we're doing, no matter what Gary Sinise thinks. Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know when you're going to get your live DVD. Q. You've sold a lot of t-shirts in the last 4 years that cater to the "critical of Bush" crowd. Are you worried about a decline in t-shirt sales after this year? A. Yes. Q. I've just myspaced you on your myspace account which clearly has all the upcoming February tour dates in the UK listed. I've just emailed you on your website which clearly has all the upcoming February tour dates in the UK listed. When are you coming back to the UK????? Me and my mates luv U!!!!! We're not gay....but we wanna take U to a gay bar!!! LOL!!!!....(we're not gay). A. Maybe, just maybe....you're really gay. L....O......L......(gunshot).
State of the Six Address: All I Want For Xmas is a Brief Update
BROOKLYN, Dec. 20 -- The following can be attributed to Dick Valentine:Jingle bells, jingle bells, ho, ho, ho...your Christmas tree is on fire. So grab a cup of egg nog, put on some crusty longjohns gather ye round and let's chat while we watch it burn. We just wrapped up touring the United States and Spain for 8 weeks. What did we learn? We learned that the Spanish take their meals (and meal timing) very seriously and we also learned that Americans do not. But we are not done learning. We have just been "greenlighted" for our fifth album and we will start recording that soon. For those of you unfamiliar with industry speak, "greenlighting" is a term that originated in the late nineties when Matt Damon and Ben Affleck started Project Greenlight as a means of plucking undiscovered filmmakers from the outer city. Then the internet changed everything. By everything, I mean Matt Damon and Ben Affleck. They were changed forever and Project Greenlight drifted into earth orbit where it was bombarded by quasars and neutrinos until it broke into two distinct pieces and came back to earth. "Greenlight" was adopted by the music industry as a term by which a record company could tell an artist, "It would be fine with us if you did a fifth record. And we'll even put that out for you if you like." Similarly, "Project" was a term adopted by many local musicians who, upon running into acquaintances at the bar, now had a term to explain what they had been working on since the last time they had encountered each other. In any event, we are going to be working on our next record very soon. I want to express how excited we are to be playing the Majestic Theater in Detroit with The Go! this New Year's. We have not played a show with The Go! in 45 years. It will be like JUST LIKE OLD TIMES. A bit of nostalgia, harkening back to the Gold Dollar Days(TM). Yes, we've all seen each other in court since then, punched a few guys in the face...but I feel that we, as Detroiters, are beyond all that now. I like to look at it all in biblical terms to help it all make sense. I look at the Gold Dollar Days(TM) as the Old Testament. I look at 2002 as the birth of Christ. I look at the fighting and the litigation as the books of Samuel...perhaps some of the book of Job. And logically, we've come full circle and ready to enter a new time this new year's eve....and this show with The Go! is to me....Revelation. Finally, I have been asked to plug my one and only American Troubador show for 2008 at Maxwell's in Hoboken, NJ on Jan. 16. If you are in the NYC area, please come on by for this low-pressure affair. Gotta go now. Look out for more shows being posted soon. We thank you for a great 2007 and as you can see, 2008 is shaping up. Happy Holidays from Electric Six.
New Merchandise "Electrifies" Moderately Successful Band's Website
Seriously, we've got a bunch of new designs available in the webstore, which include what are most likely the two best shirts this band has ever tried to sell. One involves a mythological half man/half horse captured in a moment of triumph, and the other...well, if you're a REAL Electric Six fan, you'll buy it, wear it, and never remove it from your body until the fibers rot away. Take a look, you'll see what I mean.
Heatseeker isn't just a weapon of semi-mass destruction
Electric Six was very pleased to discover that it's new album, "I Shall Exterminate Everything Around Me That Restricts Me From Being The Master" made the Billboard Heatseeker chart in the album's first week of release, charting at #50. While this shouldn't create any cause for concern in the camps of your Kanyes, your Kenny Chesneys, or your Grim Reapers, it's a nice thing to see nevertheless. We have you, the fans, the people of America who need Electric Six in their lives in some fashion, to thank for it.So thanks!
Electric Six gets "Untamed"
We know it's only September. You probably haven't even begun to think about your Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanza/Ramadan shopping just yet...but you should be aware that our good friends at THQ Games have seen fit to include "I Don't Like You" from E6's new album "I Shall Exterminate Everything Around Me That Restricts Me From Being The Master" in their new offroad racing game "MX V. ATV Untamed." The game is released on December 17 for the Xbox 360, PS3, PS2, Wii, PSP, and DS platforms.So, when you finally figure out that you or someone you love really wants to experience the collision of offroad racing and E6, there's only one possible answer. We're pretty excited about this, and you will be too if you'll just let us...show you.
Worldwide Release of "Exterminate" imminent
Electric Six is thrilled to announce that "I Shall Exterminate Everything Around Me That Restricts Me From Being The Master," the band's fourth album, will be available worldwide through Metropolis Records. As previously announced, the album is released on October 9 in the United States, Canada, Germany, France, and Italy. It will be released everywhere else on or about November 5.
Hey Montana....Let's Party!
DETROIT, Sept. 10 -- As you may already know, our fourth studio album "I Shall Exterminate Everything Around Me That Restricts Me From Being The Master" will be released in North America on Oct. 9....just a few weeks from now. We here in Electric Six are set to embark on a tour to support the release of this record, and it all felt so right....until we noticed something.We don't have a show on Oct. 9. It's a night off. We will be somehwhere between Fargo, ND and Missoula, MT. That just ain't right. We want to celebrate the release of our new record. We want to share our elation with YOU, Montana resident...in person. If you live in Billings, MT or Bozeman, MT we offer YOU the chance to throw us a record release party on the evening of Oct. 9. It doesn't matter to us who you are, what you do, who you've been with...we just want YOU to throw us a party...Montana style. All that we ask is that you provide enough champagne for the six of us, our intrepid merchandise saleswoman....and whoever you want to invite. And make sure if food is served that there is a vegetarian option. We don't care if the party is in a hotel, VFW hall, roller rink, bowling alley, or livestock slaughterhouse....we just want to party...Montana style....courtesy of YOU. We want the party to be uniquely Montanan. Perhaps we could all give each other flat top hair cuts like Senator Jon Tester. Maybe we could re-enact the "phone call scene" from David Lynch's Lost Highway which features actor Bill Pullman, native of the great state of Montana. Or we could all write detailed anti-technology manifestos like longtime Lincoln, MT resident Ted Kaczyn....er...uh...well...we'll figure something out.... So, come on Central Montana...what are you waiting for? Throw us a party! A record release party! Courtesy of YOU! Is this an incredible opportunity or what??? YES!!!!! Just submit your offer to us at electricsix@electricsix.com sometime in before Oct. 9. If we like what you have to offer, we show up and you get to meet....US! Awesome! Billings! Bozeman! Let's do this! Throw us a party! Throw it now....
True Electric Six Stories: Vol. 3
DETROIT, SARASOTA, Fla., Sept. 3 -- It's time for another edition of True Electric Six Stories, where you the citizens have events take place in your lives that have something to do with our band, and you in turn report these stories back to us, in hopes that we will find it worthy of notice on this, our most sacred website.You might recall our first report some six years ago when then-Washington D.C. resident Mary Vetting had her car broken into by a burglar. Vetting, an avid music maven, stored dozens of compact discs in the front seat of her car, only to have all but one of them snatched by the aforementioned burglar. However, much to delight of Vetting (and us), the one CD the thief elected to leave behind was "Rock Empire" by The Wildbunch, the band we sort of used to be once. Clearly, the theif had a conscience and could not live with the guilt of ruining a young woman's life to that extent. We in Electric Six were moved by our connection to such a selfless act, and we reported the exclusive story here first.  And as you would recall had we actually reported it, last year San Francisco resident Aaron H. Darsky went to the horse racing track one day and found himself faced with a decision on which horse he would bet on. He carefully gazed the listing with his beady eyes and it was not long before a certain horse called his name. The horse was named....Switzerland. At that moment, Mr. Darsky feeling the Electric Six magic coarsing through him, dropped the sum of 50 US dollars on a horse named....Switzerland. And sure enough eight minutes later, this horse crossed the finish line first, netting Mr. Darsky a payoff of $318. He reportedly used this sum to pay one-twentieth of his montly rent towards his San Francisco apartment. This occured last year and we chose not to report it immediately because it's not really that great a story.Now, you might be saying to yourselves, "these stories aren't really that great." Which brings us to two weeks ago on the white, white, white-ass, white, white beaches of Sarasota, Florida, where the dimensions of fate and Electric Six played in such mellifluous harmony and rhyme, that we just had to update this website.  Lounging aimlessly on the white-ass beach, University of Florida senior Alex Bishop was wearing his green Electric Six "Eagle Design" t-shirt that he had bought at one of our recent shows. He was drifting off into a sun-drenched languour when suddenly he was startled by a commotion coming from the water. A young girl (whose identity shall remain nameless out of respect), it seems, had actually been viciously attacked by a shark in the shallow waters along Sarasota. She was bleeding profusely and needed immediate attention. Bishop, a man of action, ran to the young girl, stripped off his Electric Six "Eagle Design" t-shirt and wrapped the girl's bleeding limbs with the shirt to create a tournicate. The young girl survived the vicious attack and is on her way to a full recovery, but it is agreed that the circumstances may have been different if not for brave Alex Bishop and his Electric Six "Eagle Design" t-shirt.So concludes another True Electric Six Story. We understand that many of you who enjoy our band have things happen to you. If you think we would find these things worthy of note (and they somehow involve us) please email us your story. It's important to us...important to the world at large....to have your stories told, so that other generations will say, "Thank you."
Preview Tracks from New Album on MySpace
With 7 weeks (give or take) to go until the street date of "I Shall Exterminate Everything Around Me That Restricts Me From Being The Master," we think it's high time to put up some of the tracks. On our MySpace site jukebox, you should find "Down at McDonnelzz," "Randy's Hot Tonight," "Feed My Habit," and "Sexy Trash."
The first and the third tracks are there to prove Valentine can sing using a falsetto. The second track is there to prove that not every song on this record will include a falsetto vocal. The final track is included to demonstrate that Na$hinal is on acid.
Enjoy.
Online Store is now back!
Check the "Store" link at the top of this page and you'll find that we've brought back our online merchandise store.
Electric Six is coming to Exterminate
E6 is thrilled to announce dates for its upcoming US tour around the release of the band's 4th album, entitled "I Shall Exterminate Everything Around Me That Restricts Me From Being The Master," to be released in North America on Metropolis Records on October 9, 2007.
This tour brings E6 to plenty of fresh territory...Fargo, North Dakota...Missoula, Montana...Little Rock, Arkansas...Savannah, Georgia. Needless to say, we're excited about this. We're also excited to announce that we'll be sharing those stages and all the others with a variety of exciting bands, such as We Are The Fury, The Gore Gore Girls, The Willowz, The 1990s, and The Golden Dogs. Isn't that exciting?
Stay tuned for plenty of other exciting information to come about the new record and the tour.
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Upcoming Shows: Fri 08/07 Zofingen Switzerland Heitere Open Air Festival Thu 08/20 New York NY Rocks Off Concert Cruise Fri 08/21 Boston MA Mass Bay Lines Sat 08/22 Milford CT Daniel Street |
